If you crave genuine connection online, you have to be authentic. Some people mistakenly believe that to be authentic, you have to share your entire life online with absolutely no filters.
But that’s not true.
You can be authentic and build lasting relationships without oversharing or annoying your community.
Though the people who preach its virtue often don’t understand exactly what the word means. Authentic is defined as: “not false or copied; genuine; real.” And, my favorite definition, “representing one’s true nature or beliefs; true to oneself or to the person identified.”
Here a few ways to show your true self to your online friends and followers:
Share the Bad
Most people automatically share their good moments on social media. For instance, they take a selfie of their new hairdo or post about their vacation adventures or proudly display their sonogram.
There’s nothing wrong with publishing these details online. But if you only show the good side of your life, people may struggle to trust you.
You’ll appear more genuine if you post about your bad moments occasionally. This means you can go ahead and upload that post-workout gym selfie, broadcast a shot of your messy workspace, or share a snap of how your fuzzy your hair looks after you ran in the rain. (But this hair pic for me, NO!)
Present a Slice of Life
You know sometimes, being authentic can be as simple as posting about a common occurrence that other people can relate to. For example, Faydra Koenig, a crisis coach, frequently posts photos of her coffee cup from Starbucks.
She shares the images to show the unusual ways servers attempt to spell her name. And she does it in a light-hearted way without embarrassing anyone or shaming them. She simply has a laugh and lets her friends in on the joke.
Participate in Conversations
You wouldn’t take your friend to a crowded restaurant and spend the entire meal ignoring her. If you did, your friend wouldn’t feel very loved. She’d be upset and wonder why you bothered inviting her if you had no intention of spending time with her. And please, be present and stay off your phone.
It’s the same concept with social media. If you have friends and followers responding to your updates, take a moment to engage with them. You don’t have to write lengthy responses. When a friend comments, you can say something simple like, “Thanks for listening!” or “Hearing your perspective on this blesses me!”
Own Your Quirks
What do you geek out about? Maybe you love collecting Funko Pop vinyl figures and you’re always adding new ones to your collection. Maybe you live for cute shoes or you’re obsessed with trying different coffee flavors.
Sharing something you love and showing off your inner dork is a great way to be authentic online. You’ll attract other people who geek out over the same things and you’ll have a good supply of frequent content since your hobby is already part of your life.
You can be authentic online and still have your privacy. The key is picking which parts of your personality and life you’d like to showcase online.
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Selfie Love & Oversharing
Ok, now this is not big news. But, did you know that selfies are photos you take of yourself? Usually, people share their selfies on social media websites like Facebook and Instagram. Taking selfies can be a helpful way to track your weight loss, boost your mood, and even increase confidence.
Yet there can be a DARK SIDE to selfies. Taking dozens of selfies while searching for the right angle or obsessing over how various filters will make you appear can be warning signs that your selfie habit might be going too far. Ya think?
But, HOW do you know if your selfies are actually a bad thing?
Definition of selfie
a photograph that one has taken of oneself, typically one taken with a smartphone or webcam and shared via social media.
It can be helpful to ask yourself four simple questions after you snap a picture…
- How do I feel?
- Why am I sharing this?
- How much of my life should I be publishing?
- Am I ok if this goes viral?
Now, I’m asking going to ask you these questions, what are your thoughts? Here are some ideas to take into consideration:
How Do You Feel?
Jennifer took a selfie and felt anxious. So, she changed into jeans and a cute sweater then took another one. She still didn’t like the way she looked so she picked out a different top and changed her hairstyle to go with the outfit.
Sometimes, a selfie habit is more about seeking external validation than anything. Jennifer had always suffered from low self-esteem so those pictures were her way of feeling like she mattered. When she realized this, she knew she needed to make a change.
Why Are You Sharing This?
Some people take selfies as a way to document a moment and remember it later. That’s why you might be tempted to take a selfie during a fun vacation or snap a picture during that beautiful sunset.
But before you share that picture on social media, ask yourself why you’re sharing it. Are you hoping to impress someone? Are you secretly wishing to make your ex-jealous? Or are you genuinely eager to record the moment?
How Much of Your Life Should You Be Publishing?
When you snap a picture, take a moment to review it. Pay attention to what’s in the background of your selfie, or you could accidentally put yourself or someone else at risk if you’re not careful.
If you’re walking around your neighborhood, is your street address visible? If you’re in a medical setting like a hospital, are there other patients in the background? If you’re inside the changing room at your gym, are people in the background exposed?
Are You I OK If This Goes Viral?
A tasteless selfie can seriously damage your reputation and even cause you to lose your job. So before you post, ask yourself if you’d want your employer or extended family to see this photo.
Don’t rely on privacy settings to save you. Anyone can take a screenshot and share your private photo with the whole world even if you’ve deleted the original image. Once a selfie is online, you have to assume that it may be digitally accessible forever. So make smart choices that won’t come back to haunt you.
Selfies can be a great way to make you feel confident or document a special moment. Just make sure you’re snapping and sharing for all the right reasons. Mmmmkay?
Use social media to boost your confidence—discover how when you download your free workbook!
So, if you are looking for additional help with this, fill out the form below and I’ll be in touch.
The Social Connection – The Unfair Comparisons
Hannah noticed her teenage daughter seemed sad one day. When she asked about it, her daughter shared that she’d been on social media. So, all of her friends were taking lavish spring break vacations and having plenty of fun while she was stuck at home.
And she was allowing it to get her down.
After listening, Hannah opened the Facebook app on her phone. She pulled up her best friend’s profile and handed the device to her daughter. “Look through her first ten photos and write down what you see on a notepad.”
Her daughter rolled her eyes but did as she was asked. When she was done, her short list read like this: Victoria is pretty, thin, has a cute boyfriend, and a good job. She’s a big fan of the Steelers and she loves rock climbing.
What she didn’t find out was:
Hannah tapped the list, “Victoria was homeless for a few months as a kid. In college, she was diagnosed with a serious digestive disease. She battled an addiction to painkillers following her last surgery. She just got out of rehab last year. But you can’t see all of that just by looking at her photos. On the outside, her life looks perfect.”
So, are YOU listening? Are YOU comparing yourself to others on Social Media?
so·cial me·di·a noun: noun: social media; plural noun: social media websites and applications that enable users to create and share content or to participate in social networking.
Looking Beyond the Selfie
It doesn’t matter how old you are. On Facebook, it’s tempting to think that what you see is the whole story. But it’s important to remember that most social users are presenting a curated look at their life.
It’s not that people on social media sites are trying to be deceptive. It’s just that many people document their happy moments. This includes things like vacations, pregnancy news, graduation ceremonies, and weddings.
Why Social Media Can Make You Feel Bad
The downside to all of this positivity is that it can leave you feeling like you’re lacking in some ways. You might look at a picture of someone else’s family where everyone is smiling and think that your friend has a wonderful life.
But what she won’t share are the unsupportive remarks her husband makes about her online business. She doesn’t post about her son’s struggle with a learning disability or talk about her daughter’s crippling depression.
How Social Media Affects You
Frequently comparing your life to the lives of others on Facebook can lead to anxiety and depression. You may find yourself asking questions like:
- What if I’m not as popular as her?
- What if no one likes my selfie?
- Does that mean I’m ugly?
- My life isn’t as awesome as hers!”
Ironically, spending more time on social media means you have fewer conversations in real life. This can worsen anxiety and depression, creating an unhealthy cycle that leaves you unhappy and isolated.
So, What Do YOU Do?
You don’t have to stay stuck in comparison mode. You can disconnect from social media when you notice that you’re feeling bad about yourself or your life.
The more you do this, the easier it will become to break social media’s effect on your outlook.
Maybe something you can add to your business is a mentor to help you work on this.
Can selfies be a bad thing? Find out when you download your free workbook!
Stay tuned for Part 2 of The Social Connection in my next blog post, Selfie Love and Over-Sharing.
Do YOU need help with your Social Media? Contact me for a 15-minute call to see how I can help you. Use my calendar link here: Discovery Call
Or, fill out the form below and I’ll be in touch.
Free Online Tools For Entrepreneurs
Most entrepreneurs realize the enormous amount of efforts to put ahead for their ventures while thinking about their limited financial resources. In my own case, I must admit it stressed me out, especially because I would have to do all by myself. Yes, and most of us start out this way.
At the beginning of any entrepreneurs journey, you can rely on key digital marketing tools that make your life easier. I can attest to that. It’s what makes ya or breaks ya!
And, you can do this without investing a single cent. There are plenty of online tools out there in the virtual world. Do your due diligence and do some research to find the ones that suit you best.
Below is a list of some useful tools that some entrepreneurs use
This by no means is a complete list of the excellent ones on the market these days. But they allow me to keep up with my own lifestyle while keeping my business at the top of the wave. So to speak!
This is one of my favorite entrepreneur’s tool when it comes to Social Media management. The free version allows you to sync three accounts.
Hootsuite allows you to execute your social media marketing strategy literally from your smartphone. You develop posts and schedule them as needed, and interact with others directly from their app or website.
I really like the fact that the tool helps you out to determine the best times for postings according to how active your audience is. In simple words, I don’t need to wake up at 3 am to post on Twitter to target a market that is active on the other side of the world while I am sleeping.
Or when I’m at the beach soaking in some much-needed rays of sunshine!
This one I absolutely love! The Grammarly tool, allows you to improve email writing and keeps you focused on writing your blog posts without the constant hassle of knowing if you’re using the right word in your content.
Great when you’re on a time crunch and for when working on your website. The free version has a plugin that can be installed in Chrome and you can also use it in all your applications you use like Word, Excel, and others. You should really check this one out.
Another favorite entrepreneur tool is Canva. Visually attractive content on your website is a must these days.
Businesses need to show a professional and credible appearance, so potential customers want to your website and read more interesting articles from you.
With Canva you can create booklets and banners to be used in different social media channels. And, creative blog post images with text and even business cards.
Their stock of templates, fonts, and illustrations plus the intuitive drag and drop functions allow anyone to create the most amazing visual content.
It’s simple to use also, but eventually, you’re going to want to get the pro version of this because it has SO many more features. And the cost is priced right for the beginner also.
Imagine yourself receiving 50 messages from prospective clients at a time, when you are a solo business entrepreneur. Chattypeople is an excellent solution to that problem, as it will answer queries automatically.
It allows you to intervene, via Facebook Messenger to push customers through the sales funnel. Such a great idea to automate some of the simplest of tasks so this would be a great service to investigate.
E-mail marketing remains an essential way to generate leads by moving consumers through a funnel for conversions.
People who are interested in your business and who provide their email are allowing that intimate experience where you can show why you are the best in your industry.
MailChimp has a free version that effectively allows you to make that happen without you even noticing through their automated features.
So, those are just some of the tools you can use to start on your entrepreneur journey
With an automated approach, your business can grow by leaps and bounds. Or, wave by wave to use a beach phrase, which I am quite fond of!
Reaching your audience effectively without compromising quality, while giving you the chance to focus on other aspects of your business.
Submit your comments below so I can help you grow. Go to my contact form to schedule a chat with me. It’s easier than you think.